Longinius Howard Archive

  • So insufferably precious

    So insufferably precious

    Precious – the movie that had champagne socialists all gooey in 2009 – finally found its way to my DVD drive the other night. It was disappointing.

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  • I so miss them

    I so miss them

    Man, how I miss Richard Pryor and George Carlin.

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  • Must have an irony deficiency

    Must have an irony deficiency

    In an old Looney Tunes cartoon, Daffy Duck, playing a sheriff, holds a gun to a crim’s face who proceeds to bite the gun in half. “Must not have had his iron today,” Daffy says. He pronounced iron EYE-run. That always made me laugh. So...

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  • We don’t really know

    We don’t really know

    Last Sunday at around 6pm I was sitting in a fish and chip shop in Tairua waiting for my order. It was humid and everyone in the place was wilting.  A few flies buzzed around.  The late day sun was pouring in through the front...

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  • A person, albeit a man, states his case.

    A person, albeit a man, states his case.

    Avoid gender-specific language unless it is necessary. In particular, avoid terms such as "man", "men" or "mankind" to refer to people in general.

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  • Governor General Michaëlle Jean

    Governor General Michaëlle Jean

    A clip of the Canadian Governor General on the earthquake in her birthplace.

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  • Wait Two Years

    Wait Two Years

    Within minutes of my son being born — December 18 2009 after a forty minute labour and a harrowing drive to the hospital — I asked the doctor, only somewhat in jest, if I could hop on the table and have her right then and...

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